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If your big day is just around the corner, you may be getting down to the nitty gritty of confirming all the final numbers with the caterer and venue, finishing off making favours, as well as starting the wonderful part of beautifying yourself in preparation for the big day.
Even if you’re armed with the best schedule in the world (my forte by the way!) there are always a few minor things that crop up on the day that you can’t prevent or avoid. However, you can be prepared and plan for some eventualities.
Here is Hanami Dream’s wedding day survival kit list for brides and grooms. It is not an exhaustive list but contains some items that I have found to be useful to carry (or better still get one of your trusty attendants to) on your wedding day to combat any little hiccups.
There are plenty of pre-made kits on the market that you can buy to fulfil the need for an emergency kit. However it’s lots of fun to pick and pack your own things that are personal and relevant for you and your big day. Perhaps you could prepare some for your bridal party or maybe your bridesmaids might assemble one for you.
What would you add to this list? I’d love to hear any of your suggestions (in the comments below) for items you’d have in your wedding survival kit.
So far in the series, I’ve introduced the three key aspects of planning a wedding that pretty much affect every other thing that is connected with your big day. These are who, where and how much (otherwise known as your guests, venue and budget). This group of three things are very much intertwined. Plus when you hold your wedding is connected too! As previously covered (in the who post), nearly all the decisions you have to make about your wedding will come back to one, two or all of the elements in what I class as ‘the holy trinity of wedding planning’.
This month I’m going to tackle the where element and your all-important choice of venue (and will look at the last element in the trinity of how much another time).
Finding the right venue that is available at the right time, for the right price, for the right number of guests will be one of the first (and trickiest) parts of planning your wedding. But once you’ve decided on this element everything else will seem like a doddle! Before venue hunting, have a rough idea of your budget and how many guests you want to share the day with you. (I told you that the where, who and how much elements would come in to play.) And have an idea of when you want it to take place too. See my top tips below to give you an idea of some other factors to help you decide the place where you’ll say ‘I do’.
Nowadays, the world is pretty much your oyster in terms of options available. If you’ve seen ‘Don’t Tell the Bride’, you’ll realise that you can get married in all types of places!
1.Where in the world
Maybe you don’t fancy risking the British weather and want to get married outside of the UK, to jet off or elope. Destination weddings are certainly an attractive proposition and usually mean that all the details get handled for you by the hotel where you are staying. Plus you get your honeymoon and wedding all rolled in to one.
However, it’s worth considering that going abroad could limit who can come to the wedding (here’s the trinity coming in to play again) as not everyone will be able to afford to attend or elderly relatives may not be well enough to travel. Plus, just remember that whoever does come will be with you for your honeymoon too! Guests would have to factor in more time to attend the wedding, so the time of year that you have your wedding may also affect whether they could come.
Before booking your tickets, you should also check the legalities of your chosen country as it may be more hassle than it’s worth to be legally wed in that country (translating of documents, time and effort etc) so you may chose to do the legal bit at home before or after the glamourous beach part. (Don’t forget to make sure your passport matches the name you are travelling under – it might be best to travel under your maiden name unless there is time to get your passport changed before you travel. (See my checklist of other documents and organisations to tell about your change of name.)
2.Pinpoint the location
Once you’ve decided on whether you’re getting married home or abroad, then you need to narrow down the location and think about:
All these factors will impact on travel costs and timings. Guests will need to consider whether they need to factor in overnight accommodation as well. Plus if your wedding is not near where you live you may not be able to visit the venue many times before the big day or meet with suppliers face to face to view products in advance.
Think about how far away the ceremony venue is from the reception venue in terms of distance but also timings. Depending on what time of day you’re getting married it may conflict with rush hour or school runs that could affect traffic and people travelling between locations.
Wherever you get married, if you are having a Church of England wedding ceremony, your Banns (an announcement of your intention to marry) need to be read in the parish where each of you lives as well as the church where you will be getting married (if this is somewhere different). So if you plan to attend the reading of your Banns, it might be harder if you have to travel far.
3.Formalities
What kind of day do you want? Perhaps you’ve already got your Pinterest boards at the ready (goodness knows how we ever planned anything before Pinterest!) If not, how do you envisage your wedding day? The style of wedding that you want will influence the venue you choose so think about whether you want something that is:
4.Legally speaking
You could have a religious or civil ceremony, or perhaps have a blessing in an amazing off-the-beaten track location and do the legal bit at another time. According to the Citizens Advice Bureau in the UK, at the moment you can legally get married in the following places:
In addition, owners of premises that are regularly open to the public (ie stately homes, hotels and civic buildings) can apply to hold civil marriages. Generally these places need to be in a permanent built structure and not an open air venue. So it’s worth checking with your dream venue to check if you could get legally married there.
5.Location, location, location
Whether you’re having a one-stop venue, or having the legal part somewhere else, you’ll want to have somewhere you can relax, eat and have fun with your guests after the ceremony. There are lots of different types of venues to chose from for your wedding reception including:
How far in advance you’re planning might open up more possibilities and how much you have to spend will offer different options. Plus the number of guests will complete the trinity of factors that will influence where you pick.
See my list of Top 20 venues in and around Oxfordshire and the Cotswolds for some local venue inspiration.
6.Size does matter
With your trusty (and let’s be honest probably controversial and stress inducing) guest list at the ready, you’ll be able to determine what size of venue you need. Other things to think about with your guests include:
The size of the venue will influence how many guests you can invite but you could increase the numbers by having an evening section that doesn’t require everyone to be sat down to eat.
7.Icing on the cake
So what’s really important to you? What are the things you won’t compromise on – those things that your wedding venue must have to make your wedding perfect?
What facilities or factors are on your non-negotiable list?
8.The fine detail
They’re probably not deal breakers, but there may be a few minor points that could sway your decision or would give a different day depending on the decisions by individual venues about their policies on:
Picking your venue may be time consuming but the effort will be worth it as the venue is probably the most expensive element of the day, so you want it to be right. Once you’ve sorted the venue (and set the date) then you can start planning all the other finer details. With the who, where and how much at the fore front of your mind, everything else can fall in to place.
More about the money side of things soon in the last element of the holy trinity of wedding planning: how much.
In Victorian times, it was popular for people to use hidden gestures to communicate their feelings and often they would covey these with flowers as they connected them each with it’s own meaning. It was an elaborate code for lovers or suitors to send messages to each other.
Another custom is to spell out the name of your future spouse using the initial letters of the flowers. Even Kate Middleton had Sweet William flowers in her wedding bouquet to Prince William.
Nowadays, you could use the meaning of flowers to help narrow down your selection for your wedding flowers. (Don’t forget to also consider what is in season, traditions and the colours of flowers too).
Here’s a list of some meanings of flowers to help with your wedding flower decision:
This is by know means an exhaustive list but just a starting guide to begin thinking about what meanings are associated with flowers for your big day. Take a look at some other blog posts on colours, seasonality and tradition of flowers at weddings.
As I’ve mentioned in a few recent posts, picking your wedding flowers can be daunting with so much choice. But you can narrow down your selection by looking at what is in season on your big day and you may be swayed by what the colour and meaning of the flowers are said to signify too.
Here’s a quick run down of some colours and what they symbolise:
WHITE
RED
ORANGE
YELLOW
GREEN
BLUE
PINK
PURPLE
Take a look at some other blog posts on seasonality, traditions and meaning of flowers at weddings.
When I was planning my own wedding, I had a vision that the church would be bursting to the rafters with copious amounts of flowers flowing from every flat surface. I wanted to go on one of our romantic country walks near where we lived and collect up armful after armful of beautiful cow parsley and adorn the church with swathes of the lovely white flowers. I wanted the feeling of a country day to be in abundance as the first impression for my guests. However, I had overlooked one very crucial fact (one which Dee McMeeking makes in her guest post this month). I got married in August and by the height of the summer there wouldn’t be any cow parsley gracing the lanes of the British countryside anymore. I had to rethink my plan and pick flowers that were in season at the time of my wedding. (Don’t worry my amazing florist made such great suggestions on flowers that the place looked amazing anyway!)
To help you start to choose your flowers, here’s a very brief guide to some of the most popular flowers and shrubs used at weddings and when they’re mainly in season in the UK (and therefore more readily available and at a more reasonable price):
SPRING
SUMMER
AUTUMN
WINTER
This is by know means an exhaustive list but just a starting guide to begin thinking about what is available for your big day. Take a look at some other blog posts on colours, traditions and meaning of flowers at weddings.
The tradition of wedding flowers is steeped in symbolism and there’s lots to think about in terms of colours, meaning and seasonality.
Flowers have been a part of wedding traditions since at least Greek times when flowers would have been grouped together in a garland to be worn on the head and seen as a gift of nature. It would also contains strong smelling herbs such as garlic or chives to ward off evil spirits. In the Middle Ages, garlands were worn entwined with ears of wheat to symbolise fertility. And with the rarity of baths, the bouquets were a nice fragrant distraction from any other lingering smells!
Nowadays, wedding flowers can compliment and reflect the theme, style, colours, tone and surroundings of the day. You can include flowers in your bouquet, corsages, button holes, table decorations, flower walls, displays at venues or as confetti or petals sprinkled by the flower girls.
Flowers are a big focus in 2016 not only in the décor but with hair accessories and headwear. Plus a new trend of ring corsages is emerging and the use of wild flowers like daisies. It doesn’t all have to be about the flowers, as foliage will be as important or instead of flowers in displays. Alternatives to traditional flowers are seeing the use of succulents in bouquets, on tables and given away as favours. Plus instead of the usual confetti, there is now a herb toss as another option which gives such lovely aromas to this part of the day.
Then once you’ve finished with your bouquet (if you’ve not thrown it to your single friends), there’s also a lovely new trend emerging of the ‘lonely bouquet’ where you leave your bouquet in a public place, with a note for someone else to find – thus spreading smiles and the joy of flowers to others. (Google it, I’ve not made it up!)
We have asked the highly talented (and award winning) Dee McMeeking to help unravel some of the mysteries of picking the right flowers, at the right time of the year, for your special day.
Photo credits: peony bouquet by Dee McMeeking, Photograph thanks to Nick O’Keeffe Photography
It’s one of those questions a bride to be will always be asked – “what flowers are you having?” and I know for some of you that can be a scary question! If you are blessed to know your hypericum berries from your viburnum then you will not need to read any further. But if your floral knowledge is more daffodils and dandelions then here is my quick guide to things you need to know about seasonal wedding flowers.
1) Flowers are seasonal
In theory that means that you can’t have certain flowers at certain times of the year. Think of it like Cadbury’s crème eggs or Easter Eggs – you don’t find them easily in shops in August or December! Flowers are the same. So if you have set your heart on a bouquet of peonies and you are getting married in the UK in November you may struggle. I say ‘may’ because the majority of cut flowers we use here in the UK are imported and most flowers are in season and being grown somewhere in the world, but that will make them more expensive.
Top tip: There are a couple of great apps that can help you out here – Flowerwheel, or Flowerbook. Both allow you to see when flowers are in season and more importantly photos and colours! So if your answer to the “what flowers” question is pink and white flowers, you can take this a step further and get some ideas with super search functions by colour.
2) Flower prices vary during the year
Flowers are one of those products where the prices will vary, sometimes quite significantly, at different times of the year. It’s as much about supply and demand as it is about seasonality. There is one big hot spot in the year that I have to mention – Valentine’s Day! The price of red and pink roses can treble if not quadruple just for that week. But other flowers can be cheaper than normal – such as orchids – purely because everyone is buying red roses.
When something is in season, it is naturally growing at its peak, the price is lower. So if you work with seasonal flowers you can get more for your money.
3) Using local flowers can save you money
More and more brides are opting for an informal look with their wedding flowers. The country garden “just picked” look where your flowers look more natural and less structured. If this is your style then you can do your own wedding flowers – certainly for your wedding reception, you might want a bit of help for bouquets and button holes. There are UK based growers who will sell you seasonal flowers “by the bucket” you just pre-order them, collect them, and then display them in your own personal style. Buying direct from the grower will save you some money and you will have very fresh flowers, often picked that day. To find your local suppliers check out this site http://www.flowersfromthefarm.co.uk/
Photo credit: ©iStock/jesshorsenaround
4) The colours of flowers change with the seasons
I mention this purely from an experience I had with a bride who was fixed on her colour scheme of navy and gold and her flowers HAD to match to these colours. Now even at the peak of any floral growing season you are not going to get gold flowers and navy is also a tricky one too! Especially if you are in February in the UK! So if you are getting married in Spring or Winter remember that you may have to compromise with your flower choices. My solution was to go neutral with the flowers – ivory, white and creams and then add her gold and navy in through adding details such as ribbons and containers. Sometimes you may just need to be a little creative with your colour scheme.
Photo credit: ©iStock/EvgenyBaranov
5) Where do I start with selecting my flowers?
Here is how I would approach finding out what is in season for my wedding flowers. First of all start with your wedding date and figure out which season you are getting married in. Search for “wedding flowers in season UK” now the UK bit is important because if you stumble on an American wedding blog in your search results what’s in season there may not be accurate for you! You will be surprised how many great guides there are already out there on blogs (just like this blog- check out these posts on seasonality, colours, and meaning of wedding flowers). Then I would pick out a few of these flowers that I liked and pop straight over to Pinterest and create a wedding flowers board. Search for “wedding flowers with xyz flowers” and see what emerges. When you have some visuals and you know roughly what is available at that time of the year you have enough research to either take to a florist or to source the flowers yourself!
Happy planning!
Dee McMeeking is the designer (wedding planner, wedding stylist & floral designer) behind Dee McMeeking Wedding Styling, a wedding styling & floral design business based in Warwickshire, UK & Dublin, Ireland. If you’re a creative with lots of great wedding ideas but need some help to bring your unique style to life on your wedding day, then contact Dee today at weddings@deemcmeeking.com. Dee works with clients from anywhere in the world and is waiting to hear more about your wedding styling ideas.
I’m still loving the trend for all white minimalist weddings at the moment.
Here are my top ten tips for achieving maximum impact the minimal way:
See more inspiration at Pinterest
where the brass band plays… a sugary, sweet retro British seaside wedding complete with pink and blue pastels galore plus beach huts, candy floss, a giant french fancy tiered cake, stripy deck chairs, ice creams, marshmallows, mix & match bridesmaid dresses and his & hers camper vans to arrive in style
Oh, I do love to be beside the seaside, beside the prom!
Images curated on Pinterest
credits:
(left from top to bottom)
Candy floss – Tumblr via http://Tumblr via http://bestfriendsforfrosting.com/2014/06/nine-ways-to-celebrate-the-everyday/
Stationery – http://www.postcalligraphy.com/ via http://www.stylemepretty.com/vault/gallery/22688
Dress and shoes – Photography by Tiffany Hughes via http://ruffledblog.com/1950s-inspired-auburn-wedding/
French fancies – Photography by Phil Wood Photo via https://www.flickr.com/photos/philwoodphoto/8464589943/
(middle from top to bottom)
Camper vans – Photography by Katleen via http://www.ministyleblog.com/?offset=1414530000000
Beach huts – via @beccadv1 Pinterest
(right from top to bottom)
Suit – by Kat Braman via http://southernweddings.com/2014/12/30/2014-memorable-menswear/
Bridesmaids’ dresses – Photography by Jen Huang via http://www.greylikesweddings.com/real-weddings/by-style/romantic/nantucket-wedding-the-white-elephant-inn/
Marshmallows – Macaronn via http://macaronn.tumblr.com/post/37109227732
Deckchairs – Snap Ginger via http://www.snapginger.com/blog/2014/6/16/pick-my-up-playlist7-9-14
Weddings are a wonderful celebration of love and marriage. And how wonderful to have all the people you care about in the same place at the same time. Along with the wedding party, the other beautifully attired guests in the room will have invested their time and money to be there on the day with you too.
At one point in my life I was a serial wedding guest and also could often be seen wearing a fancy dress stood at the front (although only as a bridesmaid all too often). Luckily I’ve now found my Prince Charming and I vowed to learn from all the weddings I’d attended to ensure that our wedding guests had an amazing time.
Here are my top ten tips to keeping your wedding guests happy and ensure your wedding is remembered as a great day by all:
1. Keep your guests fed, watered and entertained then you pretty much can’t go wrong. Fail at one of these and they’ll get twitchy, tetchy or bored. Remember everyone loves free things! If you can’t afford to pay for the bar all night then perhaps welcome drinks and some with the meal will be a nice gesture. Plus as someone with dietary requirements, I’m always impressed (& relieved) when different diets are considered at a wedding (which means I’ve got something to eat to soak up all that free drink!)
2. Keep them busy. No one likes to sit around for too long. Getting them involved and interacting will keep them engaged. Perhaps a video diary room for them to leave you a message or a photo booth for some fun. Don’t forget the children too with activities to keep their minds busy (and parents happy!)
3. Set expectations early. People are generally happier if they know what is happening and when. Give them a schedule with their invites (or in the order of service) so they at least know when the food will be served. Make it really clear in your invites who exactly is invited and to which parts. I was invited to a wedding a few years ago and the invite didn’t have any names on it. We didn’t know if our children were included let alone if we were both invited! Worse still, make it clear if they’re only being invited to the evening part rather than all day. Nothing worse than having to embarrassingly turn away guests.
4. Give clear and consistent communications. Make sure you say the same things to everyone. Don’t have different rules for different people. Or if you do, be clear why this is the case. For example, if you’ve said that it’s a kid free wedding but then you let one of your out of town guests bring their little ones with them. Or I once went to a wedding and wondered why so many of the guests were dressed in black and white. It turns out that one side of the family had been told that the couple had requested a colour scheme. However this message hadn’t been translated to all the guests including me (in my green and brown dress) and my husband (in his blue suit) plus the rest of our side of the family!
5. Choose your guests carefully. They say that the enjoyment of most gatherings can be made or broken depending on who is there. People do really make the party! So the all important seating plan can dictate what kind of a day your guests might have. Often I’ve been a guest at the evening part of a wedding and not really known anyone except for the happy couple. It’s been really hard to integrate with the day guests when you don’t know them and when you’re coming to the show late. So make sure that you can offer the evening guests a flavour of the day too. Perhaps save cutting your cake and first dance so they get to experience some ‘wedding’ elements in their experience too.
6. Inject some humour in to the day. Honestly the best weddings I’ve been to have been when I’ve been belly laughing at the speeches. Not the ones where I’ve been cringing at the inappropriateness, or yawning at the length of the speech or felt like an outsider as I didn’t understand any of the in jokes. Laughter is great and it’s really important to make the day fun for everyone but not just for a select few.
7. Show your love and gratitude. Guests may have come a long way, taken time off work or paid to stay over. So let them know how much you appreciate their support and presence either with words or presents. Isn’t it great to see a happy couple so in love and making this commitment. As a guest, I’ve definitely enjoyed weddings where the couple really look in love (it’s never good if you’re doubting whether it will work!) Just like the royal kiss on the balcony, we’re all waiting for the ‘you may now kiss the bride’ moment after your vows.
8. Pick the perfect place to say I do. Your guests don’t want to be freezing in a marquee in the winter or glomping across a muddy field in stilettos. If you’re going with something a little out of the norm then give your guests warning on different attire to wear or provide blankets, flip flops, sunglasses etc to cover the different eventualities. A wonderful trend at the moment is the weekend wedding when you pick a venue where your guests can stay over too. This is great to prolong the festivities and give you more opportunities to relax and mingle with all your guests.
9. Personalise the day. Where you can, try to make the experience individual for your guests so they feel special and an important part of your day. I once went to a wedding and the favours were all bars of chocolate. The wrapper was printed with a photograph of me as a child with the groom (who I’d know since I was very small). Every favour was personal to each guest and how they knew the couple. It still makes me smile thinking about it today.
10. Make it affordable. Think about your guests’ wallets when you’re planning the day. How much does a pint of beer cost at the bar? How much is a room to stay? How far away is the venue from where they live? It may put some guests off or leave a bad taste if things are too expensive or not good value for money. You may look at your guests with dollar signs over the head when you’re writing the guest list but they’re weighing up the expensive of coming too. Make it worth their while and give them a great wedding to remember.
